Your Email is Not Working

If you recall, we received a broken washing machine the other day.  The installer told us that he was going to report the damage and the company would call us.  Which company?  We THINK he meant the company that shipped the washer, but we weren't sure.

So yesterday we received a call - yay!  The guy wasn't kidding!  The woman said we need you to FAX us the receipt from the installer which has the receipt number on it.  FAX?  We don't have one, so I asked if we could email the receipt number to her.  Sure, she says, just use the email address on the receipt.

No problem!  I carefully type in the email address on the receipt and email her the information. 

It bounces back.

Hmm, I think, I must have typed it in wrong.  I try again.

It bounces back.

We decide to call the company since they had called us so we had the number in our phone, right?  Wrong, it was listed as a private number, so the woman must have called from her private cell.  We call the general number on the receipt.  We tell them the story.  No, they said, our email is fine, it's YOURS that is not working.

Here we go.

We deny that our email is broken, since we'd been emailing people all day.  She says, well we MUST see the receipt or we can't help you!  Oh, boy.  So I quickly figure out how to fax from our brand new printer thingy and I send the fax!  It's sending!  Yahoo!  Then the fax report comes back from the recipient that it failed.  I try again.  Failure again.  We call again.  No, they never received it, are you sure you have the right number?

What is it, because they can hear our foreign accents they assume we are not very smart?

We get VERY frustrated and my husband decides to go back to the store we bought the item from and ask them for help.  They are really nice and helpful and fax the reciept from their store.  It says it was successful. Bern calls to make sure the company received the fax.  Nope.

Bern then gets fed up and hands the phone to the store owner who proceeds to have a brief but very loud and fast conversation in Hebrew with the person on the other end of the phone.  When store guy hangs up, he says, "No problem, I will make sure you get a new washing machine in a couple of days, I'll handle it."  We are putting our faith in this person so I'll let you know what happens.  In the meantime our washing machine is sitting in the middle of our kitchen.  That would be so handy if it was really hooked up, wouldn't it?

In another milestone, we pretty much emptied out all of the boxes we could and the place is looking much more liveable.  The machsan (storage closet in the garage), however, is, um, let's just say - full.
It's kind of like those cartoons where the house is neat and clean and then you open a closet and everything falls on your head.  Kind of like that.  But hey it's in the garage so we don't have to deal with it right now!

Just a note about the weather - ok, you are already yawning, but just hold on as econd.  Someone out there must know someone who knows someone (maybe Tom Tasselmeyer?) who can tell me if I'm right or wrong that the sunshine here is brighter, glarier (is that a word?) than on the US East Coast.  Also, I love watching how the weather changes during the day.  OK, boring part over, you can wake up now.

An amusing note about our parking spot.  Not that I'm complaining because we have a covered parking spot in a country where it gets to a zillion degrees in the summer, so that's great.  But our spot, and most of the spots in our building's garage, is between two very scary looking concrete walls.  Our little rental car is not very wide and we are having issues with getting in and out of that space.  Each time, we advise each other, "Swing it more widely!"  "Back it in!" [very scary option, not used much] " "Back up the OTHER way and then turn around!" "Turn your wheel!  NO NOT THAT WAY!"  You get the idea.

Well, Shabbat Shalom AND Good Shabbos - one last story. The carpenter who came to give us an estimate this week came highly recommended. I had asked the local email group to recommend someone who speaks English.  His English sounded American, so we were thrilled.  Ends up he grew up on the Chabad kibbutz here and was born here but raised speaking English.  Today he called with an estimate and at the end wished me a Good Shabbos.  NOT Shabbat Shalom.  What an interesting country.

Are You Sure?

Wow, what a story for today.

Actually a couple - it makes up for yesterday's rather blah post.

So here was today's rundown:

1.  Turned on the dud shemesh in the morning and waited 1/2 hour - no hot water.

2.  OK, no problem, decided to do other stuff instead.

3.  Washer/dryer installer comes - yay!

4.  Washer/dryer installer tells us that the washer was delivered broken - no can install.  He takes a picture of the damage and says he is sending a report to the company that ships the item and they will call us. Hmmmm - do you believe that one? 

5.  Back to the dud shemesh - still no hot water 1 hour later.  hmmmmmmmmmmmm.....

6.  Carpenter #1 comes to give us an estimate for our closet - stays 5 minutes

7.  Carpenter #2 comes to give us an estimate for our closet - stays 1/2 hour and comes up with some really good ideas.  Guess which one we're hiring?

8.  Tried for hot water again - 2 hours later - nope. Oy.

9.  Call the site foreman and tell him about the dud shemesh.  He says he'll send over the water guy.

10. Water guy comes - it's not his problem, he says, it's the electricity guy.

11. Callt he site foreman and ask him to send the electricity guy over.

12. Electricity guy comes - says it's not his problem, it's the dud manufacturer.

13. In the meantime here come the plumbing supply guys with our vanity and sink!  But no, they don't install, they just deliver!  Now we have 3 MORE huge boxes sitting in our apt.

14.  Realize the vanity that just got delivered comes with a mirror.  We did not know this and already ordered a mirror from someone.  hmmmmmmmmmm.

15. Electrician comes for the dud and says to call the site manager - who also says to call the dud manufacturer.

16.  We call the dud manufacturer and here's where it gets good.  This is the conversation my husband had with the lady on the phone:

• Husband - We live at 17 Sara Imeinu Street, it's a new building and our dud shemesh is not working.  We were told that you can fix it.
• Lady - 17 Sara Imeinu?  Let me look it up.  Nope, no such address.  Are you sure?
• Husband - WE LIVE HERE!
• Lady - Are you certtain?  perhaps you're confused?  Do you know your address?
• Husband - WE LIVE HERE!  NOW!
• [phone hangs up]

       We call back and get it sorted out.  They SAY they are coming tomorrow.

17. In the midst of all of this the electricians (other ones) come to take care of our many electrical needs, which was convenient because they speak English and helped interpret when the Hebrew-speaking electrician for the dud came.

18. They are nice guys and we traded quotes from "Princess Bride" which was fun.

19.  So, to summarize as of today we have electricity and heat, but no hot water and can't do laundry. 

Showers and clean clothes are over-rated anyway, don't you think?

To be continued..............

More Good Stuff and The Gas Man Cometh

Once again I'd like to list a few of the wonderful things about living in Israel, and then I shall regale you with the tale of the Gas Man. [Note:  every time I hear that phrase I hear a man yelling in a booming voice, "Gas Man!" and pounding on my back door - the meter readers who used to come every month before the days of outdoor meters - sorry that was probably a very boring editorial note.]

Remembering my parents:  My parents (Mary and Jack Weintraub, a"h), truly believed in and loved the idea of the State of Israel. They weren't flag wavers and we didn't have discussions about politics at our dining room table, but I remember the look in their eyes whenever they'd talk about it.  Like it was some far off dream that only the very fortunate few could attain.  When they made their first trip here in 1972 (also their first vacation EVER in more than 20 years of business), they came back enthralled with everything.  From that time onward they'd recall their visit and look at their pictures with longing.  My father was the dreamer between the two of them and he said on many occasions that he'd drop everything and move to Israel - my mother, the more practical of the two, reminded him that they had a business to run.  I guess that made more of an impression on me that I thought, because now that I'm here I can't stop thinking about how proud they'd be and how much I'd like to tell them about it.

Children and grandchildren:  Aside from the obvious - we are living near two of our kids for the first time ever - the joy of hearing my grandchildren speak perfect Israeli-sounding Hebrew never gets old.  It is also a wonder, considering how adults struggle with new languages, how a child's mind absorbs the sounds and nuances of language so naturally. The thrill of seeing my daughters and sons in law living here, working, raising kids - being happier than I think even they realize - that is a daily joy.  If our son and his family were here - now THAT would be perfection.

Pride in the country:  I know there are lots of things wrong here, but wow, what a country.  What accomplishments - just to survive surrounded by enemies is a miracle.  I know it's a cliche but when you live here and see people smiling, laughing, living their lives, children running around - you are just so proud of what has been accomplished.

Chayalim [soldiers]:  I can't help it, I still get a thrill and a have a deep sense of gratitude and pride when I see chayalim.  I love seeing the men and women walking around the mall with their rifles slung over their backs, chatting with friends, shopping, sitting at a restaurant.  They are protecting all of us and I don't think there are words in my head that can thank them enough.  By the way, I feel the same way about the US military, but here it is just a deeper feeling.

OK, on to the gas guy(s) - there were two of them and they were very efficient.  What I never understood was why the gas line has to go somewhere where you can turn it off if you need to.  That makes sense, I guess, but I just didn't get it before they did it.  Now the gas turnoff switch is in my kitchen cabinet in case of an emergency or in case there needs to be an oven repair - no need to move the oven.  So no drama there, but wow is it good to be able to eat at home......and tonight we dine at home for the first time since January 2!

We Tour Herzliya

What adventures we had today - first, we were surprised by the oven installer who said he was coming on Tuesday - no really, I KNOW the scheduler said Yom Shlishi, not Yom Sheni, really!  Anyway, thank goodness we were here.

So this nice man starts taking the oven out of its humongous box.  As he opens the box, piece by piece, he hands me the trash.  "Here," he says.  Oh!  I get it!  I'm his lovely assistant!  OK!  He proceeds to hand me pieces of trash and then tell me to pull the bottom of the box out from under the oven.  It takes a lot of self control for me not to start laughing and saying, "Yes, boss."

He tries to explain to me why he has to halfway install the oven BEFORE the gas company comes to turn on the gas. I nod like any of it makes sense to me, but I do understand it has something to do with a possible explosion, so I guess it is important.

After that, we drove to Herzliya to visit a car dealership. I prepared for this visit by going to Google maps and mapping out the drive and writing out the directions [we didn't have a printer yet, but now we do.]  I was very proud of myself and thought, ha this will be a piece of cake. 

We left at least a half hour early to give us time to get lost.  We needed it.  The directions on Google maps had nothing whatsoever to do with the signage in Herzliya. Before we knew it we were driving through a run-down residential neighborhood.  Thank goodness for son in law Donny who directed us to the dealer.

We found out from the dealer that the discount that olim get on new cars has an inverse relationship to the car's fuel efficiency.  That is, the less efficient the car is, the more the discount for olim.  Make sense?  No?  You're right.  But we are now in the "whatever" mode. 

We decide on a car and work out a deal and guess what the salesman did?  Hold on, this is going to be traumatic.  He TOOK my Teudat Zehut, our Teudat Oleh, my US driver's license, my Israeli driver's license, AND my passport! [He did make copies for me to keep for now.]  He has to send all of those originals to the ministry of something or other and promised to give them back to me.  He put them all carefully in a special envelope and then I asked nervously, "Um, you're not sending that through regular mail are you?" 

"No!  Of course not!" he said, "we have a special courier who picks it up and takes it to the government office!  Don't worry!" 

In my head, as we left, I saw him and his fellow salesmen clutching their stomachs and roaring with laughter, saying, "Wow, she actually believed us!  Here, Ziv, put this envelope in the mailbox on your way home - or not."

Tomorrow we await the visit by the gas company.  It is Shabbos yet? Please?

Chickens, Eggs, Seats

We have finally moved in to our home.  It smells like paint and plaster, there are construction noises everywhere, it's incredibly dusty, and there are boxes all over the place, but it is ours. 

Today we received our....ahem....restroom fixtures!  We also got - ta da! - a shower head!  Imagine that!

The entire day seems to be a mad chaotic whirlwind of calling people,waiting for them to show up, having them show up and then not be able to complete the job they have come to do, hearing them promise they'll be back soon, and waiting more.

I did have one success - I complained to the construction foreman that our buzzer and hallway light was not working (I have learned the phrase "lo oved" - it does not work - VERY well.).  And guess what - the electrician guy came and fixed it!  And guess what - I forgot to ask him which switch works the dud shemesh.  Rats.

[Ed. Note: For those of you not familiar with Israeli life, the dud shemesh (pronounced "dude shemesh") is a hot water tank that sits on your roof and works via solar power.  No, this is not new eco-living, this is how Israelis have done things for ages and ages.  You turn on the dud shemesh about 1/2 hour before you need hot water (less in summer, longer in winter) and the water heats up.  You use your hot water and when you're done you turn the dud off.]

We are also waiting to have our oven installed.  You see, the gas company would not turn on the gas until the oven was installed.  And the oven installer would not come unless the gas was turned on.  What comes first, the chicken or the egg?

Hmmm.

So we called back the installer and said can you just come and install the oven, then we will have the gas company come, and then if something is not working, we'll call you back?  Sure, they said - I think they've heard this story before, once or twice.

Oh, and when the gas gets turned on - 600 shekels, please.

I have to mention that I am now more used to people rattling at me in Hebrew and responding with a blank stare and saying, in Hebrew, "I don't understand."  Sometimes they revert to English, sometimes they speak more slowly and with hand motions.  Either way I am learning.

Twists and Turns

OK, I'm going to get a little deep here so hold on.  It has occurred to me in the last few weeks that our life has taken an interesting twist in more than one way.

Yes, we are living in the Holy Land, and that is awesome in and of itself.  Yes, we are living close to two of our three kids, and that is awesome too, although we miss kid #3 tremendously.

But there is something else that I've been trying to put my finger on.  Like most of our peers, as our kids got older and left home, and we moved into senior level positions at work, we got more "stuff."  We decided to get a little nicer car, some gadgets that we didn't have before - all in all, life was getting a little easier.  For six years we lived in a lovely condo on Park Heights Avenue that had a full time porter who'd help with packages, meet the plumber when there was a problem, and all in all make things very relaxed for us.  Things were starting to be a lot easier.  And after all, after all of those years of working, raising kids, etc., it was nice to be pampered a little, right?

Then our daughters made aliyah and we decided that was the next step for us as well.

With all of our planning and thinking (and boy was there a lot of it), you don't really "get" what it means to live here for real until you do it.  It's a slow learning process, and an interesting one.  But what it seems to come down to is that we are now living in a society, in a country, where things don't come easy.

Today's crisis kind of says it all. We were all excited about having electricity (no heat yet but hey you can't have everything) and we asked the construction worker who has helped us before if the gas is connected.  "Sure!" he said.  So we can call the oven installer, right?  "Sure!"

But I've earned a couple of smarts in the past month.  I decided to ask the worker's boss as well.  He came to my apartment and I asked him if we could have the oven installed.  The look on his face was priceless.  "No, of course not!" he said, "the gas is not turned on for the building!"  "So what should I do?" I ask.  "Ask Nochum," was the response.  Nochum is the site foreman who seems to be the go-to guy when someone does not know or want to answer your question.  So Nochum gives me a number to call to get the gas turned on.  Donny (son in law and TRUE construction foreman) calls the number, they take our address and his phone number and say they'll get back to us when they verify that the building exists. Yes, they really said that.

At the same time, the guys were supposed to show up today to install all of the plumbing fixtures.  ALL OF THEM.  End result - kitchen faucet installed, bathrooms still unworkable.  And we waited a week for this. 

So back to the theme of today's post - things here are not easy.  It's kind of like going back in your life to a much more complicated era but I have to say that while it can be frustrating, it's also energizing.  Maybe things were coming too easy back in Baltimore and it's a good experience for us to start working harder for every victory.

We're feeling pretty awesome when something works (I almost danced when my internet started working today on the first try), and less frustrated than we used to be a few weeks ago.

Guess we're growing up too. It makes life interesting. 

Lights! License! Action!

You know, we came to Israel one month ago today.  For many, many years before that we had a nice, sane routine.  Go to work, come home, dinner, etc. etc., same routine next day.

For the past month every day has been a mixture of chaos, hysteria, relief, fear, and worry.

Let's take today:

8:00 am -  Go to the Modiin mall to find the office where we tell the property tax people that we are olim chadashim (new immigrants) and they should charge us less.  The nice lady tells us that we should wait until we get a bill for TOO MUCH MONEY and then come to her and she'll take care of it.

8:30 - get to the apartment (new).  It is raining and the apartment is, as usual, dark and cold.  No electricity means no heat and no light.  Start unpacking stuff.

9:30 - the guy comes to finish the tile work in the kitchen - he says it will take an hour.

10:00 - we hear that the electricity guys are in the building and soon we will have lights and heat!  they come into our apartment to check things!  so exciting!

10:15 - our new neighbor Itzik invites us over for hot tea.  He hooked up his cooker to some power line - very nice.

10:30 - I call our driving instructor who had PROMISED to call me when our licenses come in.  He says, "Oh, hello Susan, your licenses came in!  I'll drive them over today!"

11:00 - the driving instructor arrives with our licenses which are....pieces of paper - you see they are only temporary licenses.  OK, no problem, at least this is OVER!  hahahahahahaha!  No, it is not over yet!  You have to take this temporary license to the post office and pay another 200+ shekel each for the privilege of receiving a real license in the mail in a month or so.

11:15 - Bern drives over to the post office to pay for the licenses.

11:20 - the electric guys show up again, still testing, still saying "soon, soon!"  OK, we'll wait.  We continue to unpack.

12:30 - it is getting colder and colder and still the electric guys are not ready to turn things on.

1:30 - we hear the electric guys wandering around!  maybe soon!  it better be because our noses are falling off!

2:00 - THE ELECTRIC GUYS SAY WE CAN FLIP THE SWITCHES!  we do and voila! we have electricity! we stick in a bulb and it lights up!

2:02 - we walk over to the thermostat/ ac/ heat thingy pad on the wall and happily switch it to "on" and....
NOTHING HAPPENS

2:03 - we cry a little.  Our heat is not turning on.

2:04 - my son in law Donny calls the "guy" who handles this who tells us that HE has to come and turn it on and he will do it - tomorrow.

2:10 - we talk and play with Ariella who walked to the apartment from school (nice!) and have a fun time giggling and talking - ahhhh, that's what makes it all worth it.

3:00 - tile man - remember him?  the one who said he'd be done in an hour? Finally done.  Nice job.

4:00 - we need to go to a store to buy closet stuff and on the way we stop at a Toyota dealership and talk to someone about prices, etc.

5:00 - we go to the home supply store and as we check out we get harassed about signing up for a special store credit card.  The nice cashier is like a bubby and puts her arm around me and tells me how much we need this and so we get it.  Suckers.

6:00 - that's it.  zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz